curriculum
medical reports stating bipolar affective disorder [manic depression], adipositas
and asthma
HANS BERNHARD natural affection towards psychos [himself and others]
0. etoy
net.MANIACS, collection of schizoprenic-friends by etoy.BRAINHARD [a.k.a. HANS
BERNHARD]
0. the
etoy.CREW between 1994-1997, a bunch of workaholic psychopaths on illegal drugs
and ego-mania
1. THE
BERNHARDS FAMILY, rätien roots from engadine, mountain intellectuals and
extreme sports[wo]men
1. THE
BERNHARDS FAMILY, rätien roots from engadine, local version 2.0, 11/2002
1. THE
BERNHARDS FAMILY, rätien roots from engadine, local version 1.0, 01/2002
comment:
in my family, addiction seems to
be partially coded into our genes. my grandfather and grand-
mother generation has many cases of drug addiction and abuse. my [HANS BERNHARD]
natural affection towards psychos [addicted to psychos] started very early.
psychos were
attracted by my personality as well as i was attracted by psychos. many psychos
became
friends during times of excessive drug use and workoffloading periods. around
1997-1999,
many of these friends turned into nuts, being forced to stay at mental hospitals
for longer
periods of time, being treated with heavy [haldol! "haloperidol"]
medicamentation over long
periods of time [2-5 years]. only in 2002 i, myself, learned the hard very way,
that the very
i, am, a full psycho-path, clinically and medically ill, stated by real doctors
and treated by real
legal drugs. so there i was, confronted with the beautiful rush of a manic episode
[jesus trips
included] and the magical opportunity for a 3d-turnover in my time and global
network space.
after over 15 years of various [described] drug addictions, the first time consuming
only water
and fruits and nothing else [south africa], my illness broke out and showed
me the capacity of
my mind. oh my dear, my brain seems to be capable of massive focused speed and
synthetisation
[producing synthesis on all levels] without any help other than "natural"
drugs such as food,
sleep, water, sun, people. the magic trick of my transformation and the point
of success or
failure will be to meta-regulate and new balance this power and the need for
slowness, privacy
and the unbeareable nothing. the total emptyness, the nothing, is the biggest
mountain to
overcome. this fear, the fear of the boring existence, of death, of space, of
quiteness, is the
bipolar weight for madmanic maniacs like HANS BERNHARD and his secret private
alter
ego and public images such as e01, 01,hans_extrem, luzius a. bernhard, david
arson, dr. andreas
bichlbauer, ...
so addiction can be connected to
power and fear. to an overload of posibilities, choices and
brain juice.
yours truly
HANS BERNHARD
copyright 2002 HANS BERNHARD